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By Jonathan Benjamin 19 Feb, 2016
Many times in our lives we realize that we would like more of something.  More courage, more patience, more strength, etc....

Often we may think that somehow - as if by magic - we will just wake up one morning with a strong and noticeable increase in these areas.

The truth is - just like building muscles takes a workout -  these strengths also need to be flexed to be built up in that way.

Q: So, if I ask/pray for more patience, what's the workout to build that strength?

A: You will be put in situations that test your patience. 
You may find yourself being surrounded by people and situations that annoy the shit out of you - thus giving you the opportunity to flex that muscle a little more each time until it is strong.  Same with courage. You want more courage?  You will find yourself in scary situations where you are forced to be courageous.

It's a muscle that has to be flexed, that's why courage comes AFTER you face a fear, not before.

Leigh Daniel and I speak often of how we "want it to be" when we plan our "Possibilities in Paradise" events, but we also realize that we can't completely control everything,  so we remind each other pretty much hourly to also be "flexible".

There are varying degrees of how difficult being flexible can be, depending on the situation.  If you are waiting for someone to pick you up and drive you somewhere, you may be a little more or a little less flexible depending on what time you have to be at the next place.  Maybe if you wanted a burger for dinner but had chicken instead, that would be an easy thing for you to be flexible about.

But what about the times when it's a bigger deal? Or something that you spent a lot of time planning and coordinating? Or when you feel there is a lot riding on the outcome?  ( also called "attachment" but we will talk about that another time!)

Those are the times when I find it the most difficult to be flexible.   Maybe because it is then coupled with feelings of disappointment that it didn't go as planned or that I will look bad in some way - or maybe that I don't want others to feel let down. I'm not sure, but I'm learning.

The weekend of Feb 5th 2016, we embarked on our 6th (nearly sold-out) Possibilities in Paradise retreat, where once again Leigh and I spoke about flexibility to each other.

Man oh man, did we get schooled on flexibility this time....

Seriously schooled. Masters Degree-style..... PHD even.

To my memory, it was one of the wettest and coldest weekends ever in Key West and we had quite a bit of outdoor activities planned.

A yoga presentation on the beach was cut extremely short on the first day.  Then cancelled on day two, both due to rain.  We did our best to find cover at the small guest house where we all were staying - but we had to forgo the full presentation.

One of our guest speakers was scheduled for a presentation on the beach after Yoga, which also had to be postponed.

Our sunset boat cruise/dancing trip was also cancelled for the weather, which left us without a group venue for Saturday night.

On the last day, we rented a hotel banquet room for an extra few hours to accommodate back-to-back-to-back speaker presentations that got postponed from the previous day. This also really pushed the limit of how much information our attendees could absorb all at once.  I once heard that your brain can only absorb info for the length of time your butt can sit in a seat!

Our final "Red Carpet"event at a private movie theater was also cut short due to unforeseen and unavoidable circumstances.  A very abbreviated and impromptu "thank you send-off" was done back at the guest house instead of what we had originally planned.

I don't say all of this to bitch or whine. Quite the the contrary.  I am proud to be able to report that Leigh and I - as well as everyone else in attendance - just rolled with it....and with smiles.

I am happy that so many people and other businesses were also flexible with us to move things around and help.

Since flexibility was the attribute or muscle we intended to strengthen, then I am profoundly grateful for each and every one of the situations that facilitated an opportunity to flex.

So - I have just 2 questions:

What is it that you desire more of in your life?

Are you able to view situations which facilitate those desires, as opportunities - no matter how challenging they may look?


I just watched 37 people simultaneously do it all weekend long.

I know you can too.






By Jonathan Benjamin 31 Dec, 2015
Fear is a thief and a liar.

As a thief, Fear robs us of the present moment.

The vast majority of the time that we are experiencing Fear, we are in no real immediate danger. (If you're being chased by a lion or being mugged right now, this doesn't apply to you. Please put down your computer or smart phone and RUN! If not, please keep reading.)

If the present moment contains no true danger, then Fear is causing our attention and energy to be squandered on something that isn't real. At best, Fear is a hypothesis about something in the future that may or may not happen.

Which brings up the second point. Fear is also a liar.

The things that Fear insidiously whispers into your psyche are trumped-up lies. It tells you lies about what other people "probably" think about you. Lies about that thing you want to accomplish, but you'll "probably" end up failing at it. Lies about how you've "probably" screwed up your future by that horrible mistake you made in your past. All lies.

Think of how many times you've experienced Fear and the thing you were afraid of turned out to be no big deal. Your Fear has been wrong so many times, it's amazing you pay attention to anything with that bad a track record.

Fear doesn't have your best interests in mind, like it wants you to believe. Fear deprives your of your greatest gift--the present moment--and it seeks to limit your future with a bunch of lies.

Next time you experience Fear, expose it as a thief and a liar.

Catch it red-handed, in the act of its deception. And, then, unceremoniously show it the door. The quicker, the better.
By Jonathan Benjamin 30 Dec, 2015
As humans, we are indeed collectors of junk.

We collect things.

We hold onto things.

Too many things.

We do this with emotional baggage (junk) as well as with physical things (junk) – as anyone who’s ever packed their home in preparation of a move can attest, we all accumulate a LOT of junk.

With the new year directly around the corner and with a nudge from a post by Regena Garrepy called “Clean, Clear & Complete” , I decided that it was time to take action and get rid of some “junk”.

Although a few rooms in my life – ahem, I mean my house – could use it, I decided my master closet was the best place to start.

To hold on, or to let go?

Seems like there is always a battle – at least mentally – between the two. We tend to rationalize keeping….. well, EVERYTHING! That’s how it got so bad in the first place!

This doesn’t quite fit, but it will as soon as I lose a few pounds…

This just needs a button sewed on…

-I would wear this again if I had a fancy place to wear it…

This , just needs a pair of pants/shoes/belt/whatever that match it…

And so on and so forth.

I read a great article one time about a way to clean out the closet. It said: “Throw everything on the bed and ONLY put things back in the closet that you LOVE.”

Only. Things. You. Love.

I love it. It’s genius – and as I was going through the process, I had to keep defaulting back to that genius statement because I kept sliding down the path of rationalizing reasons to keep things.

Therein lies the beauty and simplicity of the theory.

It can’t be argued with.

It can’t be rationalized away.

It really doesn’t matter if you can wear it again…one day…..if you lost some weight…..if you fixed the button….if, if if….

The question is:

DO YOU ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT?

Yes or no. The answer becomes really clear, really fast.

And so it went. I gave away 6 huge bags of clothes – and it felt amazing. I highly recommend it. Especially now to start off the new year with a different kind of feeling.

Now the real power of this “do you love it” question comes if we also apply it to our daily choices.

Should I go to this place?
Should I talk to this person?
Should I take this job?
Should I date /deal with/ partner with that person?
Should I be talking about this subject?

Maybe the answers to all the above are also very clear….

Only if you love it.

And if there’s something you don’t love, but HAVE to do, then find a way to love it.

We are so scared to let go of certain things in our lives. Even things that aren’t serving us. But letting go and getting rid of the wrong/old/non-serving things in our lives makes room for the right things to show up.

How about emotionally?

What “junk” are you holding on to that is keeping your “emotional closet” cluttered?

The junk that’s keeping new and exciting things from coming your way?

It’s a block….and you can let it go.

You can choose to clean it out.

Throw it away. Start fresh with new thoughts.

Thoughts and beliefs that excite you.

Ones that look really great on you.

Ones that make you smile.

Ones that help you to enjoy life.

Ones that show you how many wonderful things there are to experience – and that every experience, can be a wonderful thing.

So grab all of those old beliefs - about yourself/life/money/love/relationships/success/self-worth - and throw them all on the bed.

Then….

Enter this new year with only the ones you love.

See you on the other side. I’ll be the one smiling at you.
By Jonathan Benjamin 24 Dec, 2015
My wife attended an amazing retreat in Cancun, Mexico this past week called the Bye-Bye Good Girl Getaway, led by Regena Garrepy. I wanted to have something sent to her room to surprise her and let her know I was thinking about her. After contacting the hotel, they sent me a list of individual amenities as well as packages to choose from.

There was everything from small cheese & cracker plates to lavish meals on the beach overlooking the ocean. Heavy on options….and heavy on prices as well. Below is part of the list:

Cheese & Cracker Plate = $385.00

Breakfast on the Beach – $1695.00

I knew it was a very nice resort – and being such, probably pricey too – I have the money, but I felt it was criminal for them to charge this much. I do my best to live my life from a mindset of abundance and not make decisions based on fear or from a standpoint of lack, however I found myself cringing…

“Do I really want to spend this amount of money on that ?”

I allowed this situation to quickly turn my thoughts negative in regard to hotels and prices. The predominant thought being:

“How dare they.”

I even had a conversation (rant) about it with my mom who was visiting. In the end I waited too long and they wouldn’t have been able to deliver it before she checked out the next morning.

I figured when she got home I would tell her (rant) about what I had tried to do and get some cool points for not spending that much money on something that should have costed far less…

I let it go and didn’t think much more of it as I spent the next day doing a few projects around the house and cleaning up for her arrival that evening.

She arrived about 8pm and after she kissed the kids and unpacked a few of her things, she said she got me a present and brought me a little square box with really neat “Day of the Dead” artwork on it. Inside was a skull shaped coffee mug that was painted up with the same artwork as the box.

As I was looking at it I noticed a sticker on the bottom with the care instructions, as well as the price:

Mug Price =  $119.00

Me: “Babe…..this is really cool, but please tell me you didn’t spend $119.00 on a coffee mug…”

Natalee: “ Haha. No, silly. That’s in Pesos .”

Then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

Oh. Oh shit. I bet the prices on the list of amenities they emailed me was also in Pesos! Now I feel stupid.

I broke out my calculator. After a few quick number crunches, I came to a harsh realization. Not only was the amenity list not overpriced, it was extremely INEXPENSIVE.

I wasn’t only wrong, I had the polar opposite assumption about them – and worse – I verbalized it (ranted) to others.


How many situations do we do this in daily? Making assumptions or judgments with a piece of the puzzle missing or with just a glimpse or a fraction of the bigger picture in view.

I wonder how many times our perception of something is the exact opposite of the way it really was.

How much annoyance or frustration could be averted?

How much energy is wasted when we do this?

How many people get hurt?

How many times have we hurt ourselves?

We need to slow down.

Before we are so quick to act and judge (and ahem, rant) we need to first get all the facts.

And from the wisdom of my friend Regena, ask yourself:

“Is the thing I’m getting worked up about, actual and factual?”

It just may not be.
By Jonathan Benjamin 26 Aug, 2015
I went out looking for turtle heads. I know that sounds macabre, but it’s actually part of the first signs of tiny sea turtles finding life outside the sand in which they were born. The first day I arrived in Tulum, my friend Ashley Sibille said, "We have planned something special for you," and sure enough… within hours we were sitting under a tree waiting for the hundreds of bodies to come bursting forth into life.

The experience took three hours, replete with rain, sand fleas, and lots of laughter and excitement. It was worth every minute to see them move, shuffle, and finally break free of the sand, seaweed, and muck and head to life in the open sea.

What an amazing experience, and one that I can't stop thinking of. The birthing and freedom of those little guys made me think of my own struggle to be free. My mountains of sand, seaweed and muck were more like fear, doubt, and bouts of uncertainty. I times I felt like the turtles I saw on the surface, with only bits of head and fin exposed. But just under the surface… that's where the real work was being done.

The bodies below the sand were working slowly and in tandem to rise to freedom. Some don’t survive the struggle, but those who did shucked off not only the shell casing they were born in, but they also shifted through the other turtles and sand to emerge into hard rain. They crawled along the beach, sometimes being crushed by unwitting beach goers, all to find their ultimate home in the sea. Those little turtles had a level of instinct and strength not visible to the eyes of onlookers.

We all have some level of birthing to go through. All of us have strengths that even we can be blind to at times. At times I feel like the turtle at the bottom of the heap, wondering about the turtles above me and how easy they must have it. Yet they have their struggles too. I may not be making any sense because I’m still trying to sort out my own discoveries.
Maybe it will come together more fully with the birthing of another round of sea babies. I'm going to go and check on them now!
By Jonathan Benjamin 26 Aug, 2015
I heard a pounding on the door. "The turtles are coming!" Excitement pulsed through me when I was told that I had one more chance to see the turtles make their way to their home in the sea. It was another chance to make sense of why the turtles resonated so with me. I ran down to the beach where they had already begun to stream out into the sand. There were a number of onlookers and flashlights, so tonight I could see not only their rise to freedom from the sand but their plight in moving forward.

They were moving toward the lights. Going sideways, going back toward their nesting place, wrestling against each other to find their way. Those of us gathered around were trying to guide them to the open water. Yet despite our best efforts, stray turtles were stuck in mounds of seaweed, in layers of sand, or floundering upside down.

I felt for each and every one of them. Being birthed is only part of the process of self-discovery. Even after you shed your shell and find your way, there is more to navigate… at least for me anyway.

Once I began learning about my own power to create my life I would have liked for it to be smooth swimming. Yet I have often felt like one of those little guys who are not only upside down, but also caught in bundles of messy seaweed.

As I watched all the supporters of the turtles I saw the amazing support I have been given. Some of you have gently pushed me back toward freedom, some of you picked me up, and some of you even threw me in the direction I needed to go (and some probably wished you could throw me!)

My experiences with the turtles meant so much to me. As each of you shares my journey to freedom, a journey filled with traps that threaten to ensnare me as surely as the unwieldy seaweed trapped the tiny bodies, I see you as my lights. I thank you all.
By Jonathan Benjamin 26 Aug, 2015
The benefits of positive thinking are well known and compelling. You don’t have to be “spiritually minded” to be convinced that positive thinking is a good thing and that negative thinking causes problems.

So, it’s a worthwhile goal to check our thinking, root out negative thoughts and replace them with positive stuff. And this obviously also applies to what comes out of our mouths. After all, the things that we say are just thoughts that are compelling enough to be verbalized.

As I’ve tried to more positive and less negative, I’ve found those labels to be somewhat limiting. When I sort my thoughts and words into those categories, it seems that a bunch of stuff falls somewhere in the middle. There is a lot of gray area.

As a believer in the Law of Attraction (that is, what I place my attention on comes into my experience), I’ve concluded that it’s not about whether something is positive or negative. It’s about what I want my experience in this life to be. Obviously, most of us want positive experiences and not negative ones, so those labels are still useful. But, the litmus test that seems more versatile to me is whether it’s something I want more of in my experience or less of in my experience.

So, I’ve started to evaluate my thoughts and words based on this question.

Do I want more of it, or, do I want less of it?

When I use this question to examine my thoughts and words, there are far fewer that get stranded in the gray zone. Based on my personal preferences, it’s generally clear to me whether it’s something I want more of or less of.

So, here is a new algorithm that I’m using and suggesting for you to use…

If it’s something you want more of, then intentionally think about it more and talk about it more.

If it’s something you want less of, then intentionally think about it less and talk about it less.

If I want more of it, then thinking about it more and talking about it more will bring more or it into my experience. Conversely, thinking about it less and talking about it less will draw less of it into my experience.

I like this because it’s simply an adjustment in what I talk and think about, not an adherence to some absolute standard. It’s like turning down the volume on one channel and turning up the volume on another. Or, it’s like buying more of one type of food at a grocery store and less of another.

Let me give a hypothetical example of adjusting what we talk about and think about.

Let’s say that someone backs into you car that’s parked on the street and leaves a big dent—and then drives away. Clearly, that’s something you want “less of” in your experience! But, it would be unreasonable to expect that you couldn’t talk about it or think about it at all simply because it’s something you want less of. You’d almost certainly have to talk to your insurance agent about it. Maybe you’d fill out a police report and also talk to a repair shop about fixing the damage. And, you’d probably tell your partner or roommate about it and explain the cause of getting home late. Also, you’d have to think through the list of things to do relative to the incident and when you might do them in the next couple days.

But, now you have a choice to make. Do you write all about it on your Facebook page? Do you tell other friends and family about it when you talk about how your day was? Do you tell complete strangers about it in the grocery line when they ask you how you’re doing? Do you lie in bed that night going over the details of the incident in your mind and wonder why this world is “full of” people who do things like that?

Even if it is something you “have to” talk about and think about to some degree, you can still choose to do that less versus more.

This also easily applies to things you want more of. Why not intentionally think more and talk more about things you want to experience more of? If you believe in the Law of Attraction, that’s clearly a way to draw more of these desired things into your life.

And, for the ultimate “flip your thoughts,” when you find yourself obsessively thinking or talking about something you want less of, how about intentionally replacing your thoughts and words with something you want more of? Simply turn down the channel of what you don’t like and turn up the channel of what you do like. It’s like your own personal manifestation radio station!

When I’ve practiced this in my own life, it immediately lifts my emotions and spirit in the present moment. That makes perfect sense. We always feel better when we are talking and thinking about something we actually like and want more of. And beyond the present moment, I believe it changes the nature of the experiences that I’m drawing into my life.

So, give it a shot today and for the rest of this week. Pay attention to your thoughts and words and ask yourself the question, “Do I want more if it or less of it?” Based on the answer, make the adjustment.

Let me know how it works for you!
By Jonathan Benjamin 24 Aug, 2015
Last year I went snorkeling with my friends Ashley Sibille and Cecilia Acuna in the waters off the Yucatán peninsula in Mexico. Truth be told, I felt that the water was far too deep for me. Yet as long as I kept my head under the water and breathed through my snorkel, I adjusted by occupying my mind with the wonders of the ocean.

Then it happened.

I was happily swimming a few feet from my friends when I saw a HUGE fish. He was hanging out towards the bottom and he was dark gray and had big teeth.

I stopped swimming and started motioning and mumbling (I kept forgetting to take off my snorkel to talk) about a scary fish I saw. I could tell they were dubious when I said it was a big fish (I am a novice after all). Big could be a flounder for me! Yet sure enough, as they went under with me, they said it was a barracuda.

I KNEW I HAD BEEN SCARED .

I kept my distance, even after learning that the big guy wasn't likely to be interested in me.

Before I left the ocean that day, I was already thinking how life tends to contain big scary fish too. You can be swimming along and suddenly, "WHAT THE HELL IS THIS?" You’re caught off guard, feeling unprepared, trying to back up, but sometimes being right in the thick of things before you can get away. I know whether fish are scary or not is purely subjective.

My scary fish come in the form of people and circumstances that trigger wounds from my childhood and youth. These are fish that shouldn't frighten me any longer, but they sometimes appear as slippery, elusive darts of shadows on an otherwise welcoming ocean floor. They keep me from diving further and going into the deepest water.

All I can do is acknowledge my fear, send the fish my love, and ultimately keep swimming. As I do that, each time I go out, I’m willing to go a little farther.

They aren't going to eat me, after all.
By Jonathan Benjamin 12 Aug, 2015
Islands in the sun
Slow and so easy today
Manifesting the hours away
Voices of paradise linger in the air
Leaving you truth
Life without a care,
Daring to hope
Feels like coming home
Places and faces
A smile to show
Strangers as friends
In the blink of eye
Boom, like that I heard him say.
A Tribe we become
Under the Key West sun,
Guitar soothes in the silky sand
Come here my friend
Take my hand
And I’ll guide you there
Show you the way
To make each little goodness
Bloom and grow each day,
How to live the dream
That lies within
With each new desire
Each hope we want
As it all comes true
We Begin again.
As night falls down
The boat rocks and sways
Dancing and loving
The PIP tribe way,
And all your friends will be waiting there,
With a hug and tears
You’ll know its right
For each day you let go the fight
And believe in all your heart desires
Leaving the sadness
In The ashes of fire
The universe works in magical ways
This place you long to sit and stay
For just another while longer.
An island paradise
Alive and waiting
For each of us
Where love flies free like wishes on stars
A million above waiting for the word
Embrace the friendship
Hold loosely the memories
They will return once more
Like a whispered wind,
And boom you’ll see
With each opened door
Manifested dreams
Come flooding through
Hold open your arms
And let the love come in
Then tomorrow at morning
We will begin again.

After attending a seminar with strangers who now are like family, I feel alive as each of my hopes and desires come so clear to me, so much goodness happening that words cannot describe.

Possibilities in Paradise is the name of the seminar and the name suits it as beautifully as the people who did the seminars. They were truly life changing.

To Leigh and Jonathan.

Please note the smiles….that’s how we all looked all weekend….its a beautiful thing my friends
By Jonathan Benjamin 11 Aug, 2015
I have been stuck in my head for several weeks now. Luckily, the weekend of awesomeness in Key West with the PIP Tribe broke that spell for a few moments … but upon returning home after the weekend, I slipped back into "asleep mode" as Craig and Anella described.

Yesterday I decided I'd had enough. Time to take some action. Some serious action! No more analyzing in my head about how I should create my coaching business, no more waiting til I'm a "certified coach" to offer my services. Nope. Time to kick some ass. Right now! Time to harness some of that amazing PIP energy that I soaked in over the weekend and put it into creation.

So I woke up early and started brainstorming in my journal. I've wanted to create a coaching business for as long as I can remember. I've wanted lead a women's group for even longer than that. So I started brainstorming … jotting down empowering words that resonate with me … random ideas for titles for my business.

The word SHINE came into my mind. Yeah, I like that word. Shine. (Makes me think of Alissa :). And as I looked up from my journal, I noticed a book that I had received as a gift which I had displayed on my dresser and it was entitled, "Shine!" Oh, I love that! Then it occurred to me that that I had a second copy of that same book because two different people had given me the same book as a gift recently. No wonder I resonate with the word SHINE.

Then I looked at my wall and noticed the sign I had hanging next to my mirror, "It's time to Sparkle and Shine!" ( Michelle Spalding , I believe you have this saying printed on your beach bag!  Then my eyes hopped over to my mirror where I noticed I had three sparkly stars hanging as decor. "Shit! I better get up and start looking all around my condo to see what ELSE is shining around here!!"

So I went on a photo scavenger hunt all around my condo and found 34 examples of SHINE all around me … from magnets on my fridge to sunrise pictures to everyone's fave Marianne Williamson poem which includes this line, "We are all meant to shine", to the awesome note I received from Fredrick at the end of PIP, "Kelly, Shine your light … you have it to Shine."

Oh my gosh, I was in pure love with the synchronicity of it all! I was surrounded by my own answer! It's time to SHINE, Kel!! :)

And so I sat down and busted out my Facebook page for my Soul Journey Coaching business, I designed my women's group and started putting together the content and materials and recruiting participants and scheduling guest presenters. And it just flowed. And it was so fun! And it was all because I decided to get out of my head and take an action step. Taking that one inspired action step has already lead to amazing things in just a short period of time.

Mike Dooley put this quote in my head way back in 2010 but it seems to be most appropriate at this juncture: Do everything you can, with what you've got, from where you are.

Thanks to all my new found TRIBE members for inspiring me with your stories, your creations, your programs, your hearts and your love over the last few weeks. I'm telling you, you're part of the reason why I'm finally ready to shine! :)
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By Jonathan Benjamin 19 Feb, 2016
Many times in our lives we realize that we would like more of something.  More courage, more patience, more strength, etc....

Often we may think that somehow - as if by magic - we will just wake up one morning with a strong and noticeable increase in these areas.

The truth is - just like building muscles takes a workout -  these strengths also need to be flexed to be built up in that way.

Q: So, if I ask/pray for more patience, what's the workout to build that strength?

A: You will be put in situations that test your patience. 
You may find yourself being surrounded by people and situations that annoy the shit out of you - thus giving you the opportunity to flex that muscle a little more each time until it is strong.  Same with courage. You want more courage?  You will find yourself in scary situations where you are forced to be courageous.

It's a muscle that has to be flexed, that's why courage comes AFTER you face a fear, not before.

Leigh Daniel and I speak often of how we "want it to be" when we plan our "Possibilities in Paradise" events, but we also realize that we can't completely control everything,  so we remind each other pretty much hourly to also be "flexible".

There are varying degrees of how difficult being flexible can be, depending on the situation.  If you are waiting for someone to pick you up and drive you somewhere, you may be a little more or a little less flexible depending on what time you have to be at the next place.  Maybe if you wanted a burger for dinner but had chicken instead, that would be an easy thing for you to be flexible about.

But what about the times when it's a bigger deal? Or something that you spent a lot of time planning and coordinating? Or when you feel there is a lot riding on the outcome?  ( also called "attachment" but we will talk about that another time!)

Those are the times when I find it the most difficult to be flexible.   Maybe because it is then coupled with feelings of disappointment that it didn't go as planned or that I will look bad in some way - or maybe that I don't want others to feel let down. I'm not sure, but I'm learning.

The weekend of Feb 5th 2016, we embarked on our 6th (nearly sold-out) Possibilities in Paradise retreat, where once again Leigh and I spoke about flexibility to each other.

Man oh man, did we get schooled on flexibility this time....

Seriously schooled. Masters Degree-style..... PHD even.

To my memory, it was one of the wettest and coldest weekends ever in Key West and we had quite a bit of outdoor activities planned.

A yoga presentation on the beach was cut extremely short on the first day.  Then cancelled on day two, both due to rain.  We did our best to find cover at the small guest house where we all were staying - but we had to forgo the full presentation.

One of our guest speakers was scheduled for a presentation on the beach after Yoga, which also had to be postponed.

Our sunset boat cruise/dancing trip was also cancelled for the weather, which left us without a group venue for Saturday night.

On the last day, we rented a hotel banquet room for an extra few hours to accommodate back-to-back-to-back speaker presentations that got postponed from the previous day. This also really pushed the limit of how much information our attendees could absorb all at once.  I once heard that your brain can only absorb info for the length of time your butt can sit in a seat!

Our final "Red Carpet"event at a private movie theater was also cut short due to unforeseen and unavoidable circumstances.  A very abbreviated and impromptu "thank you send-off" was done back at the guest house instead of what we had originally planned.

I don't say all of this to bitch or whine. Quite the the contrary.  I am proud to be able to report that Leigh and I - as well as everyone else in attendance - just rolled with it....and with smiles.

I am happy that so many people and other businesses were also flexible with us to move things around and help.

Since flexibility was the attribute or muscle we intended to strengthen, then I am profoundly grateful for each and every one of the situations that facilitated an opportunity to flex.

So - I have just 2 questions:

What is it that you desire more of in your life?

Are you able to view situations which facilitate those desires, as opportunities - no matter how challenging they may look?


I just watched 37 people simultaneously do it all weekend long.

I know you can too.






By Jonathan Benjamin 31 Dec, 2015
Fear is a thief and a liar.

As a thief, Fear robs us of the present moment.

The vast majority of the time that we are experiencing Fear, we are in no real immediate danger. (If you're being chased by a lion or being mugged right now, this doesn't apply to you. Please put down your computer or smart phone and RUN! If not, please keep reading.)

If the present moment contains no true danger, then Fear is causing our attention and energy to be squandered on something that isn't real. At best, Fear is a hypothesis about something in the future that may or may not happen.

Which brings up the second point. Fear is also a liar.

The things that Fear insidiously whispers into your psyche are trumped-up lies. It tells you lies about what other people "probably" think about you. Lies about that thing you want to accomplish, but you'll "probably" end up failing at it. Lies about how you've "probably" screwed up your future by that horrible mistake you made in your past. All lies.

Think of how many times you've experienced Fear and the thing you were afraid of turned out to be no big deal. Your Fear has been wrong so many times, it's amazing you pay attention to anything with that bad a track record.

Fear doesn't have your best interests in mind, like it wants you to believe. Fear deprives your of your greatest gift--the present moment--and it seeks to limit your future with a bunch of lies.

Next time you experience Fear, expose it as a thief and a liar.

Catch it red-handed, in the act of its deception. And, then, unceremoniously show it the door. The quicker, the better.
By Jonathan Benjamin 30 Dec, 2015
As humans, we are indeed collectors of junk.

We collect things.

We hold onto things.

Too many things.

We do this with emotional baggage (junk) as well as with physical things (junk) – as anyone who’s ever packed their home in preparation of a move can attest, we all accumulate a LOT of junk.

With the new year directly around the corner and with a nudge from a post by Regena Garrepy called “Clean, Clear & Complete” , I decided that it was time to take action and get rid of some “junk”.

Although a few rooms in my life – ahem, I mean my house – could use it, I decided my master closet was the best place to start.

To hold on, or to let go?

Seems like there is always a battle – at least mentally – between the two. We tend to rationalize keeping….. well, EVERYTHING! That’s how it got so bad in the first place!

This doesn’t quite fit, but it will as soon as I lose a few pounds…

This just needs a button sewed on…

-I would wear this again if I had a fancy place to wear it…

This , just needs a pair of pants/shoes/belt/whatever that match it…

And so on and so forth.

I read a great article one time about a way to clean out the closet. It said: “Throw everything on the bed and ONLY put things back in the closet that you LOVE.”

Only. Things. You. Love.

I love it. It’s genius – and as I was going through the process, I had to keep defaulting back to that genius statement because I kept sliding down the path of rationalizing reasons to keep things.

Therein lies the beauty and simplicity of the theory.

It can’t be argued with.

It can’t be rationalized away.

It really doesn’t matter if you can wear it again…one day…..if you lost some weight…..if you fixed the button….if, if if….

The question is:

DO YOU ABSOLUTELY LOVE IT?

Yes or no. The answer becomes really clear, really fast.

And so it went. I gave away 6 huge bags of clothes – and it felt amazing. I highly recommend it. Especially now to start off the new year with a different kind of feeling.

Now the real power of this “do you love it” question comes if we also apply it to our daily choices.

Should I go to this place?
Should I talk to this person?
Should I take this job?
Should I date /deal with/ partner with that person?
Should I be talking about this subject?

Maybe the answers to all the above are also very clear….

Only if you love it.

And if there’s something you don’t love, but HAVE to do, then find a way to love it.

We are so scared to let go of certain things in our lives. Even things that aren’t serving us. But letting go and getting rid of the wrong/old/non-serving things in our lives makes room for the right things to show up.

How about emotionally?

What “junk” are you holding on to that is keeping your “emotional closet” cluttered?

The junk that’s keeping new and exciting things from coming your way?

It’s a block….and you can let it go.

You can choose to clean it out.

Throw it away. Start fresh with new thoughts.

Thoughts and beliefs that excite you.

Ones that look really great on you.

Ones that make you smile.

Ones that help you to enjoy life.

Ones that show you how many wonderful things there are to experience – and that every experience, can be a wonderful thing.

So grab all of those old beliefs - about yourself/life/money/love/relationships/success/self-worth - and throw them all on the bed.

Then….

Enter this new year with only the ones you love.

See you on the other side. I’ll be the one smiling at you.
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